My story with depression

Hello everyone, today I wanted to talk about something a bit more personal and that is the topic of depression and mental health. This summer was a crazy one for me and no I don’t mean the good kinda crazy, it was a depressing one. For the first time in my life I suffer from a depression. I thought I been depressed before but this time it was like no other. I was actually going through a depression from back in December and little by little it kept getting worse. I was working a job that drained my energy and it took a huge toll in my life. I wasn’t feeling like myself at all, I stopped caring about me. I was neglecting my needs and my desires. I started to neglect my appearance. I stopped working out, I never had energy to do so. I even stopped my vegetarian diet and I started eating junk food, that was not good for my body. Eventually I gained weight which let to me feeling more depressed. My days consisted of me being in bed in the dark I did not want to be seen, feeling super low. Eventually something in me had enough of  feeling sorry for myself and that’s when things started to shift. I started to read and educating myself on the topic of depression. I honestly don’t agree on how the western world handles depression, I knew pills was not going to fix me. It was something internal that I needed to acknowledge something with myself.  I started self reflecting asking myself very difficult question. Until I finally realized why I was feeling so down because I was not happy with the life I was living. I felt that my soul was guiding me to make changes and I was very resistant to those changes.

Now I can say that those hard times made me self reflect so much that I am actually happy that it happen. I mean I can say that now, but when I was going through it I could not see the light I felt I was stuck in darkness for forever. We as humans have to deal with so many obstacles and hurdle in life that is going to take a toll on us. I really felt that I was so unhappy and dealing with so much pressure and stress that my soul just wanted a time out to recuperate from life. I feel very blessed that I was able to unplug (quit life) for a short time and just take care of me. Once I started to listen to myself my intuition, things got better. It was like the cloud open up and let the sun shine on me again. Is not like my life change drastically no, but my mental did. I started to feel happy, I felt joyful again. By practicing gratefulness it made me realize how lucky and blessed my life is. I was focusing on the wrong things before which let me to so much unhappiness.  I also learned to accept that life is not always rainbows and sunshine we go through difficult moments in our life but that’s just a part of life to get us to grow become stronger and wiser. 

(if you are going through depression right now and cant handle it on your own please go get help or talk to someone)

Things I did to help me during my depression.

* study depression

* self reflection/ journaling

* meditate

* become more grateful/ gratefulness attitude

* Get rid of the entitlement mentality.

* spent a lot of time alone in nature (Central Park)

* surround myself with people that I love and love me (my family)

* watched/ listen to motivational speakers on you tube

Books I read that helped me

Feeling Good by David D. Burn, M.D

Unfu*k Yourself by John Bishop

Awaken The Giant Within by Toby Robbins

The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle

xo Rosaira

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6 thoughts on “My story with depression

  1. I commend you for speaking on a very sensitive topic. You’re a strong, magnificent women! Keep your head up and continue to do great things ! Love ya always ! Xoxo

    Like

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